15.5.10

i'm letting go and it's going to be hard.


you were the only thing holding me together, the only person i could trust with every thing. i could be myself around you, i could do or say anything without caring what you would think. i was comfortable around you, i could tell you anything without you putting me down, you would always know what to say, in any kind of situation. you knew exactly how to put a smile on my face when i was at my worst and even when i wasn't with you and missed you. i thought to myself, that i am so lucky, to have had some body like you in my life. i was happy around you when i was sad. the faces you pulled and how you would stare into my eyes, made me fall deeper. we did every thing together, and i don't think i would or could ever regret any of it. what we went through, we went through it together and every bit of it was worth it, because in the end? it was you and me. well, this is how i saw it and i know you didn't or wouldn't of even thought of it like this, but i cared and so did you. i cared about you more than any thing and every thing. you were there, and now you're not and i blame myself for every second of what i did too you. what ever that was, i still ask myself what i did. it kills me inside that we don't talk anymore and haven't since your birthday. it's my birthday soon, and i hope i see you and i hope you give me one of those smiles that took my breathe away, every single time. p.s i love you, always have, always will.

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